I used to think you would come back to me. I thought Ms. Perfect would dump you and you would come crawling back. Now I know that will never happen. You are moving in with her and talking about getting married. I think this is a mistake. You are doing the same things with this one as you did with the last one. I know I sound bitter, but I can see things that you can't.
I am still angry with you. Some days I think I can move on and you will just fade into a memory. Other days I feel like you used me. You never cared for me. You were just lonely. Other days I am angry at you and myself for believing you. I believed that you would always be there for me like you promised. Now I know it is a lie. Some days the pain comes back so much I can't breathe. Some days I wish I had never met you. Then some days I am glad to have you in my life. If I don't hear from you, I miss you. I miss the late night messages, texts, and constant phone calls. I miss feeling like you cared and missed me too. Some days I want to unplug my phone and never speak to you again.
Let's face it. I have fucked things up. Badly. If I could only turn back the clock. I know the line and never should have crossed it. I wish I could take back that one moment in time. Things would be different. Instead I have to learn to adapt to my new life. I don't think I like this new life.